Sunday, October 17, 2010

My ray of sunshine

I've been depressed lately. Very down. I had a stomach virus (I guess that's what it was; I'm no doctor, obviously), but it wore me out. Then, I did a sort of "cleanse" that my massage therapist suggested. I won't bore you with the details, and I'm sure you're eternally grateful for that. Anyway, it was necessary (and still ongoing), but it's made me feel so much worse. I'm weak, and I haven't been able to take Audrey anywhere by myself for 2 1/2 weeks.

And I don't have to tell you how hard (and boring for both of us) it is to be stuck inside the house all day and all night. It can lead to very depressing thoughts. I feel like Audrey is suffering as a result of my illness, that she's not being stimulated enough here at home, even though I try my best.

There were a couple of times when Audrey and I didn't leave the house for four days straight. Last weekend, I was too sick to even go anywhere with Matt. I haven't even felt like blogging, which is usually one of my favorite activities. I've been so weak that it's hard to type for any length of time.

But, I'm hanging in there, trying to remember this verse: "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own" (Matthew 6:34). It's hard, since I'm a chronic worrier.

The other day, though, I was feeling so bad. I was lying on the floor with Audrey, my stomach cramped up, but still trying to play with her. So, do you know what this sweet little girl did?

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She crawled over to me and kissed me right on the mouth. And it made my day, drool and all.


Brianna said...

I've missed your updates. I'm sorry you're having a rough time right now. That is so sweet that Audrey gave you a kiss when you needed one. It's amazing how they can pick up on those things sometimes. Keep your head up Mama, ((HUGS)) to you!

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